You Will Never Look At Me In That Way
by StygianSea
Summary: Jo deals with the knowledge that Danny will never want her like he wants Lacey.


Jo was curled up on her bed, knees tucked to her chest, hands underneath her chin, her fists clenching the covers around her face. She had been hidden underneath them before, but the hot air under the covers was too hard to breathe. Not that she had been breathing any easier anyway. Her breath had caught in her throat the moment she understood what that video was, and it had come in ragged, short spurts ever since.

Rico had tried to calm her down; had pried the phone from her shaking fingers - and she had let him, floored as she was, unable to move, to speak. She had always heard that in situations like these your mind starts reeling, but Jo found herself going completely blank, numb. Everything went silent; Rico, the diner disappeared around her, the only thing she could see the image of Danny and Lacey kissing each other, wrapped up in each other, moving against each other...

She growled in anguish and shot up, grabbing her pillow with both hands and hurling it as hard as she could across the room. It landed softly on the ground. The soft sound only made her angrier; Jo glared at the pillow, cursing it for mocking her. Riled up, she flung the covers off and leapt to the floor, looking around for something else to throw. Her textbook was resting on her nightstand. She picked it up and hurled it, her heartbeat spiking as it slammed into the ground. There it was: the sound she wanted, noise to drown out the image that replayed itself over and over in her mind.

Jo swept her hand across her nightstand, sending books, pens and notebooks flying. She thanked the powers that be that her father was staying late at his office and her mother was out with Mrs. Desai. She didn't need them to see her in this state. She ran to her dresser and began knocking things to the ground, clothes and mirrors and unused bottles of glittery nail polish thudding against the hard wood. Near the end of the dresser were the few things she had dared to disgrace her face with the night of the dance: eyeliner, mascara, and that stupid tube of lip gloss she had so foolishly applied while waiting for him, trying to impress him.

She grabbed the makeup and, with as much force as she could muster, threw the small tubes until they hit the opposite wall. How could she have been so _stupid_? She should have known. Lacey was the prettier one; Lacey was the popular one; Lacey was the one with sex appeal. And Jo? Jo was bushy haired, Jo wore baggy clothes, Jo was an outcast and Danny would never look at her the way he apparently looked at Lacey.

Jo backed up until she hit the wall and then slid down until she was sitting on the floor, eyes staring blankly ahead. Danny would never look at her that way. Danny thought of her as his sister. Danny didn't _want_ her like that. Not in that way.

And if anything hurt worse than that, it was the fact that Lacey had lied to her. Lacey - just when she thought their relationship might be coming around - Lacey had betrayed her trust. Lacey went behind her back with Danny - Danny, who Jo was in _love_ with - and didn't tell her. Not even after Jo admitted to Lacey that she was in love with him. Even then, Lacey kept her mouth shut.

Jo would have never _dared_ to keep such a thing from Lacey. Jo _told_ her as much. She could never keep something so important from either one of them. From Lacey _or_ Danny.

Danny... He kept it from her, too. Danny hadn't said anything, either. And Jo kept wondering what was so terrible about her where her (supposed) friends kept secrets from her.

Jo had had enough of secrets. Danny kept secrets. About the necklace. About why he murdered his aunt. And now about this. Lacey kept secrets, too. About this, if nothing else (and Jo was sure there was more).

Jo drew her legs up, wrapping her arms around them and tucking her chin in between her knees. The image was still repeating in her mind's eye, like a broken record.

She didn't know if she could forgive either of them. She didn't want to, not here, not now, in this dark and quiet room, while her heart was breaking.

She heard the front door open and close; probably her mother. Jo didn't want any questions. She wanted to be left alone. She wanted to sleep. She wanted to forget.

With what little strength she had, Jo pushed herself up off the floor and padded towards her bed. She lifted the covers and slid onto the mattress, doing her best to push thoughts of Danny-related nightmares out of her head. She pulled the blankets over her head, not caring anymore how hard it would become to breathe, and closed her eyes, trying to think of anything but him.


End file.
